A guy blows a stop sign and gets caught by a policeman.
Cop says, “License and registration please.”
Guy says, “What for?”
Cop says, “You didn\’t come to a complete stop at the stop sign.”
Guy says,”I slowed down, and no one was coming.”
Cop says,”You still didn\’t come to a complete stop, license and registration, please.”
Guy says, “What\’s the […]
One day, a diver was enjoying the aquatic world 20 feet below sea level. He noticed a guy at the same depth he was, with no scuba gear on whatsoever.
The diver went below another 10 feet, but the guy joined him a minute later. The diver went below 15 more feet, and a minute later, […]
TEACHER :Name an animal which lives both in water & on land
STUDENT :Simple ‘Frog’
TEACHER :Good, now name 4 other animals
STUDENT :Simple “Frog’s mother, Frog’s father, Frog’s sister and Frog’s brother
As an old man was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him,
“Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!”
“It’s not just one car,” said Herman, “It’s hundreds of them!”
Recently a teacher, a garbage collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter informed them that in order to get into Heaven, they would each have to answer one question.
St. Peter addressed the teacher and asked, “What was the name of the ship that crashed into the iceberg? They just […]
An educated man was on a flight, beside him was a blonde
the blonde looks over and sees that the man was busy with two laptops and 3 mobile phones.
so the blonde leans over and says “boy, you really must be smart with all those gadgets”
the man answers “yes i am, i own one of the […]
A plane is on its way to Melbourne when a blonde in Economy Class
gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down. The
flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket.
She then tells the blonde passenger that she paid for Economy
and that she will have to go and sit […]
An English teacher, troubled by the unwillingness of boys in her class to take any
interest in composition, attempted to arouse them by asking for a description
of a baseball game. It was a fortunate idea for most of the boys were eager to
tell what they knew about the sport.
Only one lanky fellow disappointed the teacher’s hopes. […]
A drunk walks into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walks over to her and kisses her. She jumps up and slaps him hard.
He immediately apologizes and explains, “I’m sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her.”
“Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, […]
A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. “They’ve stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, the radio, and even the accelerator,” he cried out.
However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. “Never mind,” he […]