Archive for May, 2009

Recession Jokes

The recession might be bad, but this won’t stop us from having some laughs :)

Whats the difference between a wall street trader and a pigeon? A pigeon can still lay a deposit on a BMW.

Q: What’s the difference between an investment banker and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four.

Q: With the current market turmoil, what’s the easiest way to make a small fortune?
A: Start off with a large one.

Q: Why have real estate agents stopped looking out of the window in the morning?
A: Because otherwise they’d have nothing to do in the afternoon.

Quote of the day (from a trader): “This is worse than a divorce. I’ve lost half my net worth and I still have a wife.”

A director decided to award a prize of $1,000 for the best idea for saving the company money during the recession. It was won by a young executive who suggested reducing the prize money to $ 100.

A concerned customer asked his stock broker if the recent market decline and volitility worried him.
The broker told him that he has been sleeping like a baby.

“Really?!?” replied the customer.
“Absolutely,” said the broker, “I sleep for about an hour, wake up, and then cry for about an hour.”

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so there’s 3 blondes in a lift, suddenly the lift comes to a halt and the lights go out. First they try and call for help by using their mobile phones… but no luck. The phone’s have no signal.

After a couple of hours being stuck with no sign of help, 1 blond says to the others ‘I think the best way to call for help is by shouting together.’

The others agree, and they take a deep breath and begin to shout ‘Together, together, together

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